Loredana (2)

Here's another shot from the Loredana's concert... of course, I did some work on it, as you can see!

Today's joke:

What's the difference between a pessimist and an optimist?
The optimist learn English, the pessimist learn Chinese!

The Sky's On Fire

Here are two shots from Cornersville, TN... Yep, I've been caught by a thunderstorm, so I had to wait til it calmed down, which was perfect for a coffee and lots of shots! Oh, and a great place to have a BBQ at Pop's (at the Tennessean Truck Stop - I-65, exit 22)

Today's joke:

The French President is sitting in his office when his telephone rings.
'Hallo, Mr. Sarkozy!' a heavily accented voice said 'This is Paddy down at the Harp Pub in County Clare, Ireland... I am ringing to inform you that we are officially declaring war on you.
We voted to reject the Lisbon treaty.'
'Well, Paddy,' Sarkozy replied, 'This is indeed important news. How big is your army?'
'Right now,' says Paddy, after a moment's calculation, 'there is myself, me Cousin Sean, me next door neighbour Seamus, and the entire darts team from the pub. That makes eleven.'
Sarkozy paused. 'I must tell you, paddy, that I have 100,000 men in my army waiting to move on my command.'
'Begoora!' says Paddy. 'I'll have to ring you back.'
Sure enough, the next day, Paddy calls again. 'Mr. Sarkozy, the war is still on. We have managed to get us some infantry equipment!'
'And what equipment would that be paddy?' Sarkozy asks.
'Well, we have two combines, a bulldozer, and Murphy's farm tractor..'
Sarkozy sighs amused. 'I must tell you, Paddy, that I have 6,000 tanks and 5,000 armoured personnel carriers.
Also, I have increased my army to 150,000 since we last spoke.'
'Saints preserve us!' says Paddy... I'll have to get back to you.'
Sure enough, Paddy rings again the next day. 'Mr. Sarkozy, the war is still on! We have managed to get ourselves airborne!
We have modified Jackie McLaughlin's ultra-light with a couple of shotguns in the cockpit, and four boys from the Shamrock Bar have joined us as well!'
Sarkozy was silent for a minute and then cleared his throat. 'I must tell you, Paddy,
that I have 100 bombers and 200 fighter planes.
My military bases are surrounded by laser-guided, surface-to-air missile sites.
And since we last spoke, I have increased my army to 200,000.'
'Jesus, Mary, and Joseph!' says Paddy, 'I will have to ring you back.'
Sure enough, Paddy calls again the next day.
'Top o' the mornin', Mr. Sarkozy.
I am sorry to inform you that we have had to call off the war.'
'Really? I am sorry to hear that,' says Sarkozy. 'Why the sudden change of heart?'
'Well,' says Paddy, 'we had a long chat over a few pints of Guinness and packets of crisps, and we decided there is no fookin' way we can feed 200,000 prisoners.'

Arizona 82

Just messing with another shot from Arizona, shot taken on state route 82. Yep, I'm still here!

Today's joke:

HOW TO INSTALL A HOME SECURITY SYSTEM IN THE SOUTH

1. Go to a secondhand store and buy a pair of men's used size 14-16
work boots.
2. Place them on your front porch, along with a copy of Guns &Ammo magazine and your NRA magazines.
3. Put a few giant-sized dog dishes next to the boots and magazine.
4. Leave a note on your door that reads:
"Hey Bubba, Big Jim, Duke and Slim, I went for more ammunition. Back in about an hour. Don't mess with the pit bulls -- they attacked the mailman this morning and messed him up real bad. I don't think Killer took part in it but it was hard to tell from all the blood. Anyways, I locked all four of 'em in the house. Better wait in your truck till I get back."

Sunset in Arizona

I've been kinda busy lately, that's why I wasn't around here too much... even now, when I post this one, I am in Arizona, enjoying the a/c from the hotel room and not the hot and shiny sun from outside! And of course, being here in Arizona, what else could I post but a local image... and a local joke, based on the new AZ law regarding illegal immigrants:

Drinking with an Arizona Girl!

A Mexican, an Arab, and an Arizona girl are in the same bar.
When the Mexican finishes his beer, he throws his glass in the air, pulls out his pistol, and shoots the glass to pieces. He says,'In Mexico, our glasses are so cheap we don't need to drink with the same one twice.'
The Arab, obviously impressed by this, drinks non-alcohol beer, throws it into the air, pulls out his AK-47, and shoots the glass to pieces. He says, 'In the Arab World, we have so much sand to make glasses that we don't need to drink with the same one twice either.'
The Arizona girl, cool as a cucumber, picks up her beer, downs it in one gulp, throws the glass into the air, whips out her 45, and shoots the Mexican and the Arab.
Catching her glass, setting it on the bar, and calling for a refill, she says,
'In Arizona, we have so many illegal aliens that we don't have to drink
with the same ones twice.'