Smoking Hot

Same engine as the one I've posted yesterday, but from a different angle, and of course another manipulation!

Today's joke:

It was the first time the blonde was eating Thanksgiving dinner without her family. Trying to re-enact the tradition, she prepared a dinner for herself alone. The next day, her mother called to see how everything went.
- Oh, mother, I made myself a lovely dinner, but I had so much trouble trying to eat the turkey! said the daughter.
- Did it not taste good? her mother asked.
- I don't know, the blonde said. It wouldn't sit still!

Survivor

An engine train from the 19th century, a street and a bulding, all these three subjects are from Galveston, TX. The image is a manipulation, there are no trains running on the Galveston streets, but only historical tramways!

Today's joke:

A Texan, while visiting Toronto, found himself in the back seat of a taxi cab on the way to his hotel. Passing by the Royal York the Texan asked the cab driver:
- What's that building there?
- That's the Royal York Hotel, replied the cabbie.
- The Royal York? How long did it take to build that? asked the Texan.
- About 12 years" replied the cabbie.
- 12 years? We build 'em twice as high, twice as wide and four times as long down in Texas, and we do that in six months.
A while later the cab driver makes his was past the Metro-Toronto Convention Centre.
- What's that building over there? asked the Texan.
- That's the Metro-Toronto Convention Centre, replied the cabbie.
- Convention Centre? How long'd it take to build that? asked the Texan.
- About three years, replied the cabbie.
- Three years? We build 'em twice as high, three times as long and four times as wide as that down in Texas, and it only takes us about two weeks!
Shortly thereafter the cabbie drives past the CN Tower.
- What's that building there? asks the Texan, pointing at the tower.
- Danged if I know, replied the cabbie, It wasn't here when I drove by yesterday!

Rose

Another flower from the backyard... this time a macro...

Today's joke:

There was this $20 dollar bill and a $1 dollar bill on the conveyor belt at the downtown Federal Reserve Building. As they were lying there side by side the $1 dollar bill said to the $20 dollar bill:
- Hey mannnnnn, where have you been. I haven't seen you in a long time ?
The $20 dollar bill replied:
- Man I have been having a ball! I been traveling to distant countries, going to the finest restaurants, to the biggest and best casinos, numerous boutiques, the mall uptown, the mall downtown, the mall across town and even a mall that I just newly built. In fact, just this week I've been to Europe, a professional NBA game, Rodeo Drive, the all-day retreat spa, the top-notch hair salon and the new casino! I have done it all!!!
After describing his great travels, the $20 dollar bill asked the $1 dollar bill:
- What about you? Where have you been?
The $1 dollar replied:
- Well, I've been to the Baptist church, the Methodist church, the Presbyterian church, the Episcopalian church, the Church of God in Christ, the Catholic church, the Mormon church, the church of the Latter Day Saints, the A.M.E. church, the Disciple of Christ church, the...
- WAIT A MINUTE! WAIT A MINUTE!! shouted the $20 dollar bill to the$1 dollar bill, then he continued:
- What's a church?

Blooming Time (color)

Same picture, but color...

Blooming Time

I took this shot about two weeks ago, but it's still blooming!

Today's joke:

A blonde finds herself in serious trouble. Her business has gone bust and she's in dire financial
straits. She's so desperate that she decides to ask God for help. She begins to pray ... "God, please help me. I've lost my business and if I don't get some money, I'm going to lose my house as well. Please let me win the lotto."
Lotto night comes, and somebody else wins it. She again prays ...God!, please let me win the lotto! I've lost my business, my house, and I'm going to lose my car as well."
Lotto night comes and she still has no luck. Once again, she prays ... "My God, why have You
forsaken me? I've lost my business, my house, and my car. My children are starving. I don't often ask You for help, and I have always been a good servant to you. PLEASE let me win the lotto just this one time so I can get my life back in order."
Suddenly there is a blinding flash of light as the heavens open. The blonde is overwhelmed by the Voice of God Himself .....
"Sweetheart, work with Me on this ...... Buy a lotto ticket!"

The Rockies - Denver Area

This is another shot taken while I was coming back from Seattle.

Today's joke:

If a dog were your teacher, you would learn stuff like:
When loved ones come home, always run to greet them.
Never pass up the opportunity to go for a joyride.
Allow the experience of fresh air and the wind in your face to be
pure ecstasy.
When it's in your best interest, practice obedience.
Let others know when they've invaded your territory.
Take naps.
Stretch before rising.
Run, romp, and play daily.
Thrive on attention and let people touch you.
Avoid biting when a simple growl will do.
On warm days, stop to lie on your back on the grass.
On hot days, drink lots of water and lie under a shady tree.
When you're happy, dance around and wag your entire body.
No matter how often you're scolded, don't buy into the guilt thing
and pout.... run right back and make friends.
Delight in the simple joy of a long walk.
Eat with gusto and enthusiasm.
Stop when you have had enough.
Be loyal.
Never pretend to be something you're not.
If what you want lies buried, dig until you find it.
When someone is having a bad day, be silent, sit close by and nuzzle
them gently.
And finally, never trust anyone until you sniff their butt.

Multnomah Falls

A shot from my last trip to Seattle (two weeks ago)... I took a break at the Multnomah Falls (Oregon).

Today's joke:

A guy was driving his Mercedes on a country road when he picked up a hitchhiker. After a while the hitchhiker ask the driver what for is that circle from the front of his car.
-With that thing I aim my new victim, then I hit them with the car, says the driver, makin' fun of his mate.
And to prove it, when he saw a pedestrian walking aside the road, came closer to him, but before the impact he pulled the stering, going back on the road, then he looked in the mirror and saw the pedestrian laying over the walkside.
-You see? says the hitchhiker, that circle ain't good at all. You should be happy because I opened the door and got him!

The Cardinal

Finally I got one... he seemed to be a nice guy cause he waited for me til I got my camera, then as soon as I took the shot he took off...

Today's joke is a medical warning!

The American Medical Association has declared that the long
term implications of drugs or medical procedures must be more
fully considered.

Over the past few years, more money has been spent on breast
implants and Viagra than is spent on Alzheimer's disease
research. It is now projected that by the year 2015 there
will be fifty million people wandering around with huge
breasts and erections who can't remember what to do with them.

And some stuff about Texas!

Here is what Jeff Foxworthy has to say aboutfolks from Texas ...

If someone in a Lowe's store offers you assistance and they don't work there, you may live in Texas ;

If you've worn shorts and a parka at the same time, you may live in Texas ;

If you've had a lengthy telephone conversation with someone who dialed a wrong number, you may live in Texas ;

If 'Vacation' means going anywhere south of Dallas for the weekend, you may live in Texas ;

If you measure distance in hours, you may live in Texas ;

If you know several people who have hit a deer more than once, you may live in Texas ;
If you install security lights on your house and garage, but leave both unlocked, you may live in Texas ;

If you carry jumper cables in your car and your wife knows how to use them, you may live in Texas

If the speed limit on the highway is 55 mph --you're going 80 and everybody's passing you, you may live in Texas ;

If you find 60 degrees 'a little chilly,' you may live in Texas ;

If you actually understand these jokes, and share them with all your Texas friends, you definitely live in Texas ..

Native American Tradition

They are indians indeed, but from South America! What's more, they're traveling through Europe, performing and selling their music on the streets...
I took this shot about a year ago in the city of Alba Iulia - Romania.

Today's joke:

Two guys were talking:
- Did you hear what happened to John?
- No, what happened?
- He stole my wife!

And now some interesting Facts about Texas

Here are some little known, very interesting facts about Texas .

1. Beaumont to El Paso : 742 miles
2.. Beaumont to Chicago : 770 miles
3... El Paso is closer to California than to Dallas
4.. World's first rodeo was in Pecos , July 4, 1883.
5. The Flagship Hotel in Galveston is the only hotel in North America built over water. Destroyed by Hurricane Ike -2008!
6. The Heisman Trophy was named after John William Heisman who was the first full-time coach at Rice University in Houston ..
7. Brazoria County has more species of birds than any other area in North America
8. Aransas Wildlife Refuge is the winter home of North America 's only remaining flock of whooping cranes...
9. Jalapeno jelly originated in Lake Jackson in 1978.
10. The worst natural disaster in U.S. history was in 1900, caused by a hurricane, in which over 8,000 lives were lost on Galveston Island .
11. The first word spoken from the moon, July 20,1969, was " Houston ," but the space center was actually in Clear Lake City at the time.
12. King Ranch in South Texas is larger than Rhode Island ...
13. Tropical Storm Claudette brought a U.S. rainfall record of 43" in 24 hours in and around Alvin in July of 1979...
14. Texas is the only state to enter the U.S. by TREATY, (known as the Constitution of 1845 by the Republic of Texas to enter the Union ) instead of by annexation. This allows the Texas Flag to fly at the same height as the U.S. Flag, and may divide into 5 states.
15. A Live Oak tree near Fulton is estimated to be 1500 years old.
16. Caddo Lake is the only natural lake in the state.
17. Dr Pepper was invented in Waco in 1885. There is no period in Dr Pepper..
18. Texas has had six capital cities:
Washington -on- the Brazos, Harrisburg , Galveston ,Velasco, West Columbia and Austin ..
19. The Capitol Dome in Austin is the only dome in the U..S. which is taller than the Capitol Building in Washington DC (by 7 feet).
20. The San Jacinto Monument is the tallest free standing monument in the world and it is taller than the Washington monument.
21. The name ' Texas ' comes from the Hasini Indian word 'tejas' meaning friends. Tejas is not Spanish for Texas ..
22. The State Mascot is the Armadillo (an interesting bit of trivia about the armadillo is they always have four babies.. They have one egg, which splits into four, and they either have four males or four females.).
23. The first domed stadium in the U.S. was the Astrodome in Houston.